


Fish

by Kiloueka



Series: No Spoilers [3]
Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Birds, Birds, Cute, Fishing, Fluff, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Light-Hearted, Seagulls - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-10-19
Packaged: 2020-12-24 01:14:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21090932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiloueka/pseuds/Kiloueka
Summary: 2B and 9S go fishing and are harassed by seagulls.A quick prompt my friend gave me to get me back in the groove of writing.I don't think she specifically told me to mention seagulls but they are horrible creatures and the next Untitled Goose Game should be about seagulls.





	Fish

**Author's Note:**

> Depression's still kicking my ass but I'm starting to beat it maybe? I've been getting some stuff done. Holding off on Limbo and OTMC for a bit and working on random one-shots and snippets and whatnot.

“Hey, 2B why do we have to fish… like… all the time?” 9S asked, knee-deep in fish juice and machine oil at the edge of a mostly-submerged building. Over the past few hours, they’ve amassed hundreds of hungry seagulls just waiting for the chance to snap up an easy meal. The noise was almost deafening as they squawked and screamed whilst fighting amongst themselves.

“Orders are orders,” 2B responded cooly, not looking in his direction. Her pod bobbed in the waves and with a flick of her wrist she commands it to yank a large machine turtle from the frigid waters. It thrashed around on the line for a moment before 2B ran her sword through it and tossed it into the pile, narrowly missing some gulls.

“Wh--what?” 9S jerked his head back slightly while turning to 2B. “We didn’t _ get _orders to do any of this, I thought we were supposed to be scouting out the machines along the shoreline.”

“Is this not the shoreline?” 2B answered, throwing her pod back in the water. “Are these not machines?” 

“I mean…” 9S began but stopped as a seagull snuck up on him and nearly yanked his visor off. He yelped and waved his arms around and the bird flew off with a low grumble and perched upon the recently destroyed turtle. It pecked at the rusted metal and flew off again when its beak failed to pierce its thick iron shell.

“We’re kind of pulling up a lot of bycatch with it though… I feel kinda bad.” 9S eyed the small mackerel 2B just pulled in. She took it off the line and threw it behind her; it didn’t even have the chance of hitting the ground before the gulls got to it.

“The birds are eating the organic fish are they not?” She cast her pod again.

“Well yeah but…” a seagull pecked at 9S’ foot and he stomped and waved a hand until it waddled off. “It’s kind of messing with the ecosystem and you know… the balance of nature or whatever.”

“What do you mean?” 2B asked. “We catch the fish, the birds eat the fish, is this not the circle of life you’ve talked about?” 

“Well, I mean--deaauaauguhh!” 9S screamed as his pod pulled a massive marlin out with no warning. The fish thrashed around and his pod struggled to stay above the water and haul its catch in.

“W-wait pod, you can release the poor--aaack!” 9S screamed again as his pod flung the fish on the shore, nearly impaling him with its bill. In a flash, the entire flock of hungry seagulls descended on the beast and began feasting on the fresh meat. 9S watched in abject terror as they stripped the fish to the bone in a matter of minutes; he wondered how the hell humans managed to survive as long as they did when these creatures existed alongside them.

Even 2B stood stiffly as she watched the carnage, her face was pulled tight and her hand was slowly reaching for her sword. The pods floated above them from a safe distance, recording the whole ordeal.

“2-2B, I don’t wanna be the one to say this but can we please get back to the mission?” 9S nearly cried out, covering his nose as the stench of death wafted toward him from the torrent of a thousand wingbeats.

A shrill cry rang out as two seagulls went at each other in a violent brawl. Feathers flew as they tumbled toward 9S and the shock of the sudden movement sent him reeling backward and sputtering. 

What he didn’t take into account was the sea wall dangerously close to him and in a flash, he felt his heel slip off the ancient concrete and his body careen off the edge.

He screamed and squeezed his eyes shut, bracing himself for the shock of the frigid, salty ocean water. He faintly heard a gasp and frantic footsteps and before he could feel the bite of the sea, a hand clasped around his wrist and pulled him back up to safety in one fluid motion.

9S stumbled forward, nearly landing on his face but 2B caught him with her other hand and steadied him. He let out a sharp breath and stood up, looking to 2B and smiling sheepishly.

“Are you okay?” She asked with a hint of worry in her voice.

“Yeah… hah… yeah, I’m…” he panted loudly, “I’m okay. Thanks, 2B, you saved my life.” He chuckled breathlessly.

“I…” 2B took a step back and released her grip. “That fall would hardly have killed you, I just did what was within my duties to prevent any unnecessary damages and maintenance costs.” She turned away slightly.

“I know, it was a figure of… never mind,” he sighed but with a smile still on his face, “you saved me from… a lot of unpleasantness. Thank you.” 9S looked at her almost expectantly, hoping his revised gratitude would be more readily accepted.

“You’re welcome, 9S,” 2B responded with a small nod and a hint of a hint of a smile. 

9S continued to stare at 2B as he felt his cheeks flush and his Black Box temperature rise. Before he could formulate a response, however, 2B turned away and retrieved her swords.

“Let’s get back to the mission, we’ve wasted enough time already.”

9S sighed and shook his head as an exasperated smile crept up his face.

“Yeah, yeah.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey If you like fish and fishing, you should check out reddit.com/r/FishCognition !  
Fun fact: About 50% of catch-and-release fish die as a result of their injuries! And 100% experience unnecessary pain and stress just so a human can have some good ol' recreational fun!  
Fishing minigames are fun and all but don't let them make you believe that fishing itself is a victimless sport.


End file.
